Autism & Spells

I'm not normally superstitious.

But you know when you say something and then think "I really wish I hadn't said that" ?  Well, that happened me this morning.

I was having coffee with a friend while our boys were at youth club.  The craic was great.  We had hot coffee, a good laugh, and two autism-free hours.  All good-for-the-soul stuff.

But then I said it.

"You know what, Finian's in great form these days."

I could almost hear the wind die, the earth stop rotating and the planet collectively hold it's breath.  Small creatures dived for cover and birds dropped from the sky.  They looked at each other in disbelief and stuttered "she said what???"  Minor demons stirred from their lairs, rubbed a thousand years sleep from their eyes and whispered "we'll see about that".

Fuck sake, like.

I scanned the coffee shop for a black cat, a pair of magpies, a rabbit's foot..... anything to undo the hex I'd just woven on my son's demeanour.  But Costa was fresh out of spell antidotes.  I couldn't even get them on my points card.  

We almost got away with it, too.  

Fin remained in good form until this evening, when my jinxed words caught up with me.  He indulged in a most impressive meltdown.  I spent over an hour lying on the sofa with him screaming in one ear, and Little  Einsteins screaming in the other.  It's next to impossible to decide which was worse.  

On the surface of it, I was attempting to co-regulate his emotions.  In reality, I was wondering what unspeakable creature invented Dry January (probably one of the minor demons I woke up), and why in the name of Jesus, his mother and all the holy baby lambs I was doing it?   

Anyway, the meltdown has passed, the earth has caught her breath, and the demons are safely tucked back in their satanic little beds (they're cute when they're asleep).  I'm drinking chamomile tea instead of industrial-grade ethanol.  Finian is singing Here Come the Rubber Dubbers in Russian.  The rest of Dry January will be a piece of piss.

"you just can't afford us"